just a thought: #14

by iren monkey

i think that it’s definitely positive to hear genuine validations from those we hold close while we’re surrounded by so many fakes and liars in the world…even the least expressive of folks could benefit from an honest sentiment in their darkest of hours.

that being said, who better to offer candid words of advice and affirmation than a strong influence in your life?  in my particular case, that influence is my father.

as a self-proclaimed daddy’s girl, i feel blessed to have had such a close bond with my father and how he’s been such a positive male figure in my life.  what i’ve learned in the last few days is that it’s impressive how much a father’s words can really impact that way a daughter feels about herself and the way she views her life.  whether a girl/woman has a close bond with her father or not, what he says will always weigh heavily because he is technically the first man to have an emotional bond with her.  i believe that a father figure is the benchmark of how anyone should treat a girl and he is responsible for the standards she’ll use to guage unconditional love.  that bond is incomparable and sacred.

my wonderful father has made it his personal goal to teach me what i should expect from a man and it’s definitely been hard to find someone to measure up to those standards especially during the most formidable years of my dating life.

it’s only natural to feel defeated when time and time again, my investments in relationships fall short of lasting forever, but instead of dwelling in my defeat, my father’s words came just in time to bring me out of my frustration.

recently, i had one of the most important conversations with my father about life and approaching a new milestone this upcoming decade as i turn 30.  it’s not about what i don’t have, but instead, what i do have.  and that’s a lot more than what others can say about themselves.  it’s amazing how the fundamental ideals that he’s instilled in me just needed a quick refresher to bring me back to reality.

the assurance that no one that knows me better than my own father and for him to know exactly what i needed to hear during this particular stage in my life was the best reminder that i was doing just fine by no one’s hands but my own.  he raised a woman who could stand on her own and rise above any trials and tribulations with her head held high.  all i had to do was slow down just enough to remember that people can come and go, but i will always have my father’s influence to remind me of my worth.  and that, my friends, is all the validation i need.  

i’m gonna be just fine.